My throat will be slit
I was watching Insideous…
Blown up on a roof in China?
Hooray! My evil brother will throw me off a cliff where I will get trampled by a stampede of wildebeest. Oh goody.
Strangled and burned with a blow torch. Gotta stop watching Criminal Intent.
(Source: aninanimatefuckingobject)
I want to knit a blanket.
For my best friend’s birthday, I wanted to give her something that would brighten her day, help her to — and sorry, this is stolen from Oprah — live her best life. Or, I thought, what about her most awesome life? Is there even an object that could do that? I thought about it for a long time. And…
It is the best ever, seriously.
Black Books: Bernard’s songs
Includes hits such as “I live alone in a tree” and “I am a simple cow (I can marry my brother)”
Ahh, Jim, they’d melt your face off.
(via derelickmyballs)
Is it legal to marry a sweater?
This blog always makes me laugh.
Every. Single. Time.
The view from my kitchen window this morning.
